Obama’s next move

by L Steed, Alejandro Contreras

Obama’s legacy is now firmly in place and this January he’s due to hand over the keys to the castle to one lucky little lady (please, please, please let it be her!).

He’s created Obamacare, taken out Osama Bin Laden, lead America out of recession and most importantly of all, shown the world his birth certificate.

As he puts it in a recent interview with Stephen Colbert, “there’s not a lot of room for promotion” in his current job, and his wife will divorce him if he stays, so we ask ourselves, what will the president do with himself now that he’s stepping down?

Here are a few ideas the President may wish to consider:


Public speaker

oh … I suppose we didn’t really need the photoshop team for that one…

He could always take a leaf out of many world leaders’ book’s and go into public speaking. It’s not like the man’s out of practise and if Clinton’s record is anything to go by, there’s a fair bit of money in giving your 2 cents to Wall Street.

Become a receptionist to really push his beloved Obamacare on the ground

From talk shows to rallies to addressing the nation, Obama has used every platform he can to get Obamacare noticed and have people getting signed on. It’s seen to be a great innovation, but sadly a bit of a flop. Time to get your hands dirty and do some ground work Mr President.

Secretly still run things from behind the scenes

As anyone in a tin foil hat, or an extremely well scripted Mr Trump, or even many of Mrs Clintons emails, will gladly tell you, there’s a lot going on behind the scenes of Washington. Seeing as he’s done good work at the top job, why not just slink into the shadows with the rest of the Illuminati!?

Direct the next season of House of cards

He knows the game better than anyone. Why not get the man who sits in the office to show us how it really is?

Re-amend his birth certificate and run for president of Kenya

Donald Trump called him on it back when it really mattered. Why not just dig out the real birth certificate and stick to what you’re good at?

Launch “keeping up with the Obamas” on MTV … and E!

A family of rich people making a shed ton of money for being filmed going about their daily lives. It’s worked for the Kardashians, the Osbournes and pretty much everyone living in 90210. Sounds like an excellent business plan and what with Michelle’s exceptional popularity and the girls growing up, which Obama’s going to be your favourite? Plenty of room for a spin off too!

Senator of Hawaii

He’s from there and there are worse places to govern from than the surf, sea and beaches of Honolulu.


As he pointed out on Jimmy Kimmel’s mean tweets, he’s been lifting some pretty heavy legislature over the years. The man never seems to break a sweat unless this 2014 video of him pumping iron is anything to go by…


See here, here and here for audition tapes.

Stand up comedian

He’s put down world leaders and hecklers on the international stage, we’re pretty sure he’ll be able to handle a little stage.


So, with all that in mind, what do you think the president should do next?

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